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Visitors' Stories -- Bianka (unedited)Hi Nicole ! I found your very great web-side and made the very fast decision to contribute with my story ! All in all it is a different story than most of the stories published at your page until now, but anyway I am sure it is an interesting contribution as well. My name is Bianka, I am 31 years old, German, divorced, no kids or breastfeed. The problem with my boobs started during puberty: on the one hand I was glad to realize my breasts growing; sure there was no difference in the way I watched my body-development as most teenage-girls will watch their body. Unfortunately I had to realize very soon that there is something wrong with the way my breasts were growing: while the right one had already stopped at quite a small level, the left one grew another strong part. Moreover: it was not just the growing of the breasts as such, but the nipples became in a different size and kind as well. The nipples of my right breast was some kind of falling inside while the other one was a bigger and outside-standing nipple. Finally the bigger breast had a complete different looking: it was flat and hanging, a bit round with a fold on its the lower side. The smaller breast was standing, even some kind of looking upward. U cannot imagine what that meant for me as a teenage girl: first of all it was some kind of life-trouble to buy bras – while all my girl-friends told about their new and wonderful bras, showing them and all that – I could not find a fitting bra at all: no one sells bras with an a-cup on the one side, a b-cup on the other side. Either one cup was to big and the small breast was falling in it around like mad, or the other cup was too small so the bigger breast was contused. I decided not to wear bras at all, but because of the flat and hanging form the bigger breast started to move so strong that everybody was able to see my little secret. All in all: it was terrible ! I stated to really hate my body: being in the sports-class or – even worse – in the swimming-class was like hell because of my breasts: I never found a swim-suite fitting on my breasts, wearing tight shirts was impossible, and while taking a shower after sport all the other girls in my class could see my different-sized breasts and nipples and soon there was whisper about it everywhere ... there is no need to tell what the guys were talking about ! So what I did was hiding my breasts so nobody could ever see them !
So what is the situation today ? I still cannot find well fitting bras: the difference in size is not so strong any more, but it is still quite an “impressive” difference. The form of my breasts is still completely different because there was no equalization of the tissue. The left breast is still looking up while the right breast is flat and hangs down. Laying them in a bra results a different size of the cups, of course, so I still cannot wear any tight shirts or whatever. I try to avoid going to the beach or something like that still to hide my breast-problem.
Anyway: what I am planning today is to make a third surgical operation: I am sure that my very first idea – enlarging them both – is still the very best idea. I have taken a look to some other pictures on the gallery of this homepage. I dream to have well-sized breasts on day in my life: no more a and b, but a good c or even a d. I am still afraid what happens with the scars when making the enlargement, but I hope to find a doc who can convince me from his good (!) ideas. To close my letter I will show what size and look I am talking about: I made a collage and will publish this here as well ... Best wishes, sincerely, yours Bianka
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In 1994 I could
not go on living with my problem: my boy-friend had always accepted me the way I was, but
I wanted to make a change. I decided to do an operation and went to a doctor.
Unfortunately I did not look for several docs to get some more and different advise but
just asked one doc. Today I know that this was a very big mistake: I asked about the best
way and I thought about enlarging the smaller on and the bigger one with different sized
implants. But the doc just spoke about the risks of implants and that this would be no way
of compensation. He convinced me just to reduce and lift the hanging, bigger breast and to
do nothing with the smaller one. So I accepted what he did ! Today I just can tell
everybody who sees the need in an enlargement or reduction to listen to several docs and
think about it very, very well !
In August 1994 I
went into the operation room for about two hours: he cut off the nipple-area and
took away the skin around it. Than he fixed the reduced skin to the nipple-area again. So
he wanted to lift the bigger breast ! Of course this did not function at all: what he
– as well as me – seemed to have forgotten was that without the reduction of the
tissue as well the pressure on the scars would become to high. So what finally happened: I
lost nearly all my sensitivity in my left nipple. The breast is still hanging, but not
hanging so much. The form is still the same. The scars became that very, very strong and
wide that my doc decided in 1995 to do a second operation just to cut scar-tissue. This
helped a little bit, but is no real solution as well.
In my opinion the
white scars are one of the most important aspects to me because I believe my breasts are
ugly because of that ! I hate to undress myself, let any men taking a look to my breasts
or even letting them touched. Worst thing is: the scars started growing again and I have
no idea how they will react during pregnancy !
